Adult Behavioral Developmental Stages of Attachment

stage statements In abstract-stage statements, individuals often quantified their emotions following a loss. Although abstract-stage statements were often relatively short, the statements differed from primaryor concrete-stage statements because they contained some kind of recognition that the reaction to an event could have been different or could be variable under different circumstances. (F, age 8) I just wasn't afraid. Because, I don't get afraid when I lose something. But if it's something very, very special to me, really, really important and I always loved it, then I would be a little more scared and worried that I lost it. I'll never see it again. [She seems to have two ideas: some things that are not very important do not make her get very afraid; other things that are very, very important would make her get more afraid she seems to be beginning to deal with different values of “importance” and of “fear” and relating them to each other she also seems to be thinking hypothetically she doesn’t have a specific thing in mind but just says “If it’s something...”] (F, age 41) I didn't have, there was nothing adversarial between her and me. [There was nothing at all here that was adversarial is a quantification statement; adversarial is a value of the kinds of interactions that can range from adversarial to cooperative.] (F, age 41) All I wanted was to have a quiet life. [All is quantification, quiet is a value of a variable.] (F, age 25) And it was just a continual saying goodbye. [A continual is an abstract quantification statement.] (M, age 23) I'm trying to be specific instead of talking in vague generalizations. [Value=vague, of a variable that can range from vague to specific.] (M, age 23) I have moments of elation [There is quantification, “moments” of elation; elation is variable.] and moments of depression. (M, age 23) This is probably the most painful loss I ever experienced. [Quantifying the experience.] (M, age 41) It was stolen once. I felt bad but that was more a sense of economic loss. [This little piece here “more ... an economic loss” is a kind of quantification of loss, so that statement is Abstract – 9.] (M, age 41) All Americans [quantification] had a sort of slow anger at the enemy. Formal-stage statements _________________________________________________________________________________ Formal-stage statements about relationships mentioned relationships between two variables or propositions. It can often be discerned that they relate two abstract-stage entities. There is linear logic, which also is embodied in blaming others for what goes wrong. (F, age 41) It was very abrupt, yes. And at the time there wasn't much people could do about cancer, so it was a really dayto-day deterioration that you could follow. [At one time treatment used to have that other kind of outcome, now it has this kind of outcome so this is a statement about things varying over time. But what makes it formal is that there is a function described day-to-day deterioration is a formal statement, increases in deterioration with time.] (F, age 41) Well, at the time she died in '71 at the time even here I think she wouldn't have lived. [Variable, being here or there could have an effect on the outcome (living or dying) so this is formal.] (F, age 25) Attachment to things or people would be something like wanting to be near it, them. [If you are attached then you want to be close a formal statement of a rule.] (F, age 25) Being able to absolve myself from feeling guilty, for not loving him like he loved me. [Not loving him caused me to feel guilty and this event, whatever it is, would absolve me.] (M, age 23) I guess the main point would be that someone else is important enough to you that they become a high priority in your life. [If they become important to you, then they become a high priority: relationship between variables.] (M, age 23) When you lose something in a relationship, like with a girl friend, that's lost opportunity and lost self esteem in some cases. [Relationship between variables.] (M, age 23) Well, I think that when you grow up it's a natural process to have an idealized portrait of your parents. [A relationship between a) how old you are and b) your view of your parents.] (M, age 41) Yah, I mean at that time I was mad because I remember part of my anger was directed at Japanese, at the enemy who had killed him. [They killed him, so I was mad at them, and I now know that was wrong it is an implicit explanation, looking back, of why he felt that way and how those two events, his father’s disappearance and his anger were related.] (M, age 41) You know a kid growing up he wants to play ball with his father. [Being a “kid” is causal of wanting to play ball with one’s father.] (M, age 41) I guess if it was a really crummy motorcycle [9 abstract one type of a motorcycle] or I really hated it in some way [9 abstract] and somebody stole it, I might be potentially happy. [10 formal starts with “if” so the statement as a whole is hypothetical; also it’s a chain of events, one leading to the other or causing the other, and even though some can “stand in” for others (like, either it’s a crummy motorcycle or I hated it in some way), they don’t appear to interact in any real way.] Systematic-stage statements Systematic stage statements about relationships went beyond talking about linear causal relationships between two variables to either explicitly discussing multivariate systems or to referring to such systems. The problems or loss were seen to be part of a system. (F, age 41) Yeah, you can care for a pet. It's more universal than just an attachment to a person or several people. [Because it suggests that there is a system of caring that is made up of attachment to specific persons, to several people and potentially to pets or other objects.] (F, age 41) I realized that, for instance I was left alone with my dad, and I realized that all my relationship with him was through her, and I had to reestablish my relationship with him and that took long years. [11 -systematic I had a certain kind of relationship with him before her death and it was totally dependVol. 13, Spring 2007, Behavioral Development Bulletin